What a funk looks looks like
"Hey! We're Compacting!"
Sounds like fun, right? But what if you take comfort in shopping?
This last week I realized more will have to change in me if this is going to work. I have a tendency towards depression, and for me, dperession means hours of doing the bare minimum of living. Driving kids to school, eating and sleeping.
And my normal vice is gone. I can usually drive down into town and shop a little, then buy myself a nice dinner. I'VE GOT TO STAY HERE. I've got to face the REAL.
Which mean I've got to deal with my kids- graciously. I've GOT to pick up dirty clothes and put clean ones away. I've GOT to take a shower. (seriously- when I'm down- my hair gets braided, I throw on a scarf, and use lots of lavender oil to mask any smells.) (sad but true.)
It's so funny that my posseions are causing so much problems with my life. Not being to get stuff stinks, not be able to take care of the stuff I have....ugh! No more stuff!
I'm feeling better today, but I am left with my house in a shambles. Will I be able to un-bury myself and get all my stuff together? I hope so.
I included pictures to show you what my house looks like RIGHT now. This is what a funk looks like for me. I'll update when I'm on top of things.
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3 comments:
Okay, I wrote a huge comment that was lost, somehow ... but the nutshell is this: thank you for this post and these pictures. It is nice to know I am not alone in my habits and my emotional shopping vices.
I've been feeling like I need a reward for all this life changing stuff I've been facing this month. I *really* want to spend money on myself, but instead I've decided to give myself the gift of my own time - pampering me and taking care of me for a bit, letting the housework wait. Maybe you can carve out some TLC for you time, too?
Best Wishes!
I just needed you to know i have read and really appreciated your blog lots. i am alot like you Carolyn and am also trying to keep on top of things. I feel so tired all the time though (part of my depression). you are an inspiration to me. keep it up!
sarah (in England, uk)
Carolyn, I hope that you are feeling better, but even if you are not, remember that the bags of newly-bought goods don't really deal with the underlying issues. I too struggle with depression, but have decided to make a discipline of practicing gratitude and acceptance right now. I feel so much more space inside of me--emotional energy to deal with the real issues, and a greater sense of peace. I wish you peace.
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